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Tashlich

September 19th, 2009

Standing quietly at the fence looking down at the small stream exiting the lake, I had little to say. The birds were not quiet; I could hear children and dogs in the distance.

I was by myself. The Mole out for a walk, Ms Soprano in the US, the other three in Germany.

It has been both an excellent and an extremely lonely, challenging year. Walking between two worlds, I do no quite fit in either.  With family scattered, I have built a support system.  I know that I have made life long friends, but it doesn’t quite make up for having my time with DH be by phone rather than in person for weeks at a time.

The future is unsettled: each of the next two springs will see an offspring graduate and move on to higher education. I retire in 2011 after more than 30 year of Army life.

I want to throw doubts and worries along with regrets into the water and have them carried far away.

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  1. September 21st, 2009 at 06:34 | #1

    “I want to throw doubts and worries along with regrets into the water and have them carried far away.” Well said! And…amen.

  2. September 21st, 2009 at 15:10 | #2

    You sound very loney and sad. I hope you get some together time with your family before the year is out.
    Take care.

  3. September 22nd, 2009 at 02:51 | #3

    I miss you.

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